The question of how to keep a guy interested is one that plagues many women because there never seems to be a simple answer. And nothing can seem more frustrating than meeting the perfect guy and not knowing what to do or say to attract him and get him to like you. After all, wouldn’t it be great if you could get a man to chase YOU instead of the other way around?
One of the keys to keeping a guy is learning how to create the irresistible attraction that will make him want you. It doesn’t matter whether the man you want is your new co-worker, a long-time friend, your husband, or even a complete stranger you met at a party or a bar. When you know how to attract men, you can ignite the flames that will keep a man interested and have him constantly thinking of you, even if he’s surrounded by other women. You become a guy magnet.
But first it’s important to talk a little bit about attraction and exactly how it works.
One of the most important concepts to understand is this: attraction isn’t a choice.
But what exactly does that mean?
What it means is people don’t consciously decide to be attracted to someone. A guy doesn’t approach you, talk to you for a little while, and then think to himself, “Oh, she seems nice, smart, and funny. Oh, and she’s pretty cute too. I think I’ll be attracted to her.” He doesn’t consciously decide to be attracted to you.
Instead, he either FEELS attracted to you or he doesn’t, and it happens subconsciously.
The good news for you is that you can learn how to keep a guy interested by understanding the steps you can take to trigger attraction in a man almost instantly. “The Woman Men Adore…And Never Want To Leave” by Relationship Doctor, Bob Grant, can help if this doesn’t come naturally to you.
By pushing the right buttons, you’ll make him feel attracted to you and he may not even know why. But that powerful feeling will be associated with YOU and it will drive him to think about you and chase you because you’ll become the object of his desire.
Before we answer that question, it’s important to understand men and women are extremely different creatures. They think differently. They act differently. They want different things and have different priorities in life and relationships.
When you truly understand men, it gives you a powerful edge in the dating game because most women simply don’t “get guys”. This causes many women to view men as heartless, sex-driven pigs who care about no one but themselves. And once you’ve developed that sort of attitude toward men, it makes having a lasting relationship extremely difficult.
In his recently released ebook focused on helping women find love that lasts, Evan Marc Katz, the #1 dating coach for smart, strong, successful women, points out that many women don’t attract the wrong men, they accept the wrong men and mistakenly believe chemistry will be enough to change a broken relationship.
But it’s hard not to have that type of attitude toward men when you’ve been hurt over and over again in relationships. It seems like a hopeless battle to find the right guy who will love you unconditionally and commit his life to you.
It doesn’t have to be that way…
Evan continues to point out in “Why He Disappeared” that when you’ve been hurt by a man in the past, you tend to do things like:
Choose not to date at all
Try to make a guy earn your trust
Pull away from a guy at the first hint of trouble
Tell him your relationship goals on the first few dates
Want to clarify where things are headed in the first few months
Women do these sorts of things to protect themselves from getting hurt, but as Evan points out, the only thing you’re protecting yourself from is the possibility of falling in love.
A key point is this: understand what men really want – not what they SHOULD want – and you’ll have your PICK of quality men!
You see, the women who do understand men are constantly surrounded by guys who would do just about anything to be with them. They’ve learned what men want, what drives them, and how to keep a guy interested with very little effort. These women are in control and have the power to play hard to get if they so choose. They CHOOSE the men they want to date rather than waiting around hoping some guy, any guy, will ask them out.
These women understand men are about feelings and not about looks. At first that might sound backwards, but let me explain.
It’s true, your brains and looks will always attract men, but they won’t keep them. No matter how smart or how beautiful you are, if you make a man feel micromanaged, criticized, emasculated, and pressured, then he won’t stick around. But if make him feel like a million bucks every time he’s around you, then he’s not going anywhere. Not sure how to do this? Use these tips.
Nationally recognized relationship expert, Kara Oh, has spent years studying and understanding men and has compiled an excellent resource called, “Men Made Easy” that can help you in your relationships with men and give you the confidence that your Prince Charming really does exist. It’s one of the best resources available if you want to know exactly what drives men to want to be with you…or to run from you.
So let’s get back to those attraction triggers that will keep him interested…
Physical appearance is important. But don’t think you have to be a super model to get a man. This simply isn’t true.
However, you must understand men are biologically wired to be attracted to the physical appearance of a woman. Your physical appearance is the very first chance you have to catch his interest and get him to chase you because it’s the first thing he sees, long before he ever gets the opportunity to know you.
Again, remember attraction isn’t a choice and most men need to FEEL a physical attraction for you. It’s key if you want to make him want you.
So does this mean you have to be skinny with long legs, big boobs, and a butt that’s to die for in order to get a man? Does it mean you have to wear high heels, mini skirts, and low cut shirts and look like you just got off the stripper pole or came in from standing at the street corner?
Looks alone won’t get a man to commit to you long-term…
Many of the most popular women who constantly have guys around them aren’t what you would consider “supermodels”. While looks are important, they aren’t the only thing that matters to men. A man doesn’t commit to a woman based solely on her looks. And always remember, what is attractive in one man’s eyes isn’t always the same thing that is attractive to another man.
It takes much more than physical appearance to catch and keep a man. The best selling ebook, “Girl Gets Ring” reveals exactly what it takes to go from meeting a man to getting him to commit to you and seeing you as the only woman in the world for him.
The key point to take away is you should always pay attention to your looks and be as beautiful as you can be. Focus on being cute and beautiful rather than sleazy or slutty. You don’t want to send him the wrong message and make him think you’re giving him an open invitation for sex.
The way you smell can also play a key role in making a man want you. Never overlook this. Smells alone can drive men crazy.
Good Girls Being Bad
You can also keep him interested by utilizing a good girl/bad girl interplay when you interact with him. The ultimate fantasy for many men is being with a girl who is good when she’s around other people, but who knows how to be “bad” when she has her man all to herself.
A good girl is one who is loyal to her man to no end, even when countless other guys hit on her and chase after her. She doesn’t just “put out” and is never considered a “slut”. You would never consider her to be a sexual animal.
Yet, when she gets alone with her man, her bad girl side comes out. She understands how to turn him on and says and does the right things to make him constantly think about her. She uses feminine grace to drive him wild behind the scenes.
This type of woman is flirty and fun and knows how to talk dirty to a guy in a classy way that makes him constantly think about her, even when he’s away from her or around other women. She doesn’t even have to sleep with him to turn him on, and she understands how to keep him wanting more in the most subtle of ways.
If you’re naturally shy and don’t know how to flirt with men, “The Secrets Of Flirting With Men”, can help. But if you’re ready to up your game and learn how you can attract a man and keep him interested with just a few words or a properly timed text message, then the text dating and text flirting sections of Michael Fiore’s Text The Romance Back, may be exactly what you’re looking for. If you want to work on the “bad girl” side of you, these dirty talk examples can help.
Ending Interactions On A High Note
Getting a guy to like you also relies on making him feel incredible every time he’s around you. You always want to end your interactions on a high note so he associates only fun, positive feelings with you. After all, no guy wants to be with a woman who is boring, constantly complaining, or who seems to have a negative outlook on life, love, and relationships.
Knowing how to play hard to get can help you in this regard. Men always want to chase after a woman who seems to be just out of their grasp. Don’t be afraid to end interactions with a man when things are going really well. This will keep him wanting you even more.
For example, if you’re talking to him on the phone and you’ve just had an awesome conversation or a good laugh together, don’t be afraid to cut it short right then and there. Simply say something like, “Hey, I gotta run, but I’ll talk to you again soon.”
At this point, he’s having a great time and by leaving when he hasn’t yet had enough of you, it makes him think about you and crave you even more. Many women make the mistake of talking or interacting too long and the conversation goes from amazing to stale and boring. And it kills some (or a lot) of the attraction. Let “Calling Men: The Complete Guide To Calling And Emailing the Men You Date” help you know exactly what to do and say when you interact with your man through phone calls, texts, and email messages.
If you really want to turn things up a notch, flirt with him and then walk away as you give him a big smile. It will drive him crazy thinking about you. If you want a man to chase you, then you always need to remain a little bit of a mystery and make him feel like he can’t quite get a hold of you. This is exactly how to keep a man interested, and when you master these tips, the dating game becomes easier and a lot more fun.
Derek Maak has been writing about relationships for as long as he can remember. He hopes to bring more passion, romance, intimacy, desire, and FUN to every interaction with your loved one. Connect with Derek on Twitter, Facebook, and Google +.